1. Your biggest enemy is yourself. That enemy is the one who makes you overthink, develop a low self-esteem, make you emotionally unstable and give you headache. Love yourself from the inside first before you expect love from the outside.
2. You are not in a relationship with a man until you both clearly state it. Don’t get carried away by the idea of love with a man simply because he spends time with you or treats you special
3. If you are in a relationship or marriage, demanding your man to spend time with you will not make him do so. A man willingly spends time with you because you give him peace and he enjoys your company. Attract him the same way you peacefully and warmly attracted him when he was pursuing you
4. Mr. Right is the man who offers a conducive environment for you to be the best you. Choose your environment well
5. Your husband will never find you if you keep fooling around with other women’s husbands
6. Mr. Right can also hurt you. The difference is that Mr. Right hurts when he hurts you, he apologises, owns up to his short comings and makes effort to love you better. Love is a learning process
7. Silent treatment will not solve anything. If your man hurts you, learn to speak your hurt and teach him to love you better. The best couples have mastered the art of conflict resolution
8. Most men don’t mind being corrected. What they do mind is the tone with which you correct them. The world has been harsh towards women for years, but tone down your defensive mode and learn to communicate effectively with respect and love. You two don’t have to fight and argue to look like you are addressing issues
9. A man who is not serious about you will avoid accountability, will operate in grey areas and will hide you. You will never go far with him. Serious men like being kept accountable, they take pride in what they commit to and are not afraid of responsibilities
10. Getting pregnant for a man will not make him serious about you. Men are serious about a woman because they have a personal vision that includes her
11. If you are not a woman who knows herself, relationships and marriages will bring you drama. Your self awareness is your personal responsibility
12. If you do know yourself and you get married to a man who doesn’t know himself, he will frustrate you. Be careful in him being lost he doesn’t make you lose you. When marriages go bad, the repurcations are heaviest on the woman
13. Just because you have a relationship with God or you marry someone who has a relationship with God does not mean your marriage will work. You two have to learn to relate with each other, not just with God
14. There are good men in this world, just like there are good women in this world. You will not encounter those good men if you keep entertaining the wrong ones and frequenting where the wrong ones dwell
15. During dating, if you want to see the calibre of man you are getting to know, put off sex and see if he will stay, if he is interested for more than just sex. Be careful, some men will tell you all kinds of promises to get you to bed. They are just curious about how sexing you feels like, not interested to grow with you. Once they sex you, the curiosity goes, especially after you get pregnant
16. Relationships/marriages don’t always end or struggle because of the man, sometimes you are the problem. Learn to be honest and objective to see your wrong. If you two work together, your love will grow stronger
17. An insecure man will fight everything that is good about you; from your success, your career, your beauty, your personality, your education and he will blame you for his own issues. He is the problem, not you. Don’t dim your light for a man whose identity is in darkness
18. If you have a good man, don’t exaggerate the wrong he has done today to the point that you forget how good he has been to you. Don’t make him feel unappreciated because he didn’t do as you wanted him to today. Keep your perspective and don’t overreact
19. Don’t be that woman who has been so damaged by wrong men that when the good man comes along you push him away
20. Before you go and share your issues with your man to your friends, share them with him. The solution lies between you two. If he is stubborn or you two still disagree, then share with someone he can be accountable to, like a true friend or a counsellor, if it gets worse, involve both your parents
21. Disagreement or a bad day in your relationship or marriage doesn’t mean it is breaking apart. Keep calm. Don’t panic
22. No matter how much your husband loves you, he might not see your dreams or even support you that much. You have to learn to defend and nurture your dreams even if he doesn’t get it
22. Complaining and nagging will never give you the desired results, it will only push your man away from you and make him tolerate you instead of enjoy you. If you want to inspire him to do more for and with you, appreciate him, have pleasant conversations with him, be easy to talk to
23. If you don’t learn how to say no, people and the world will use you and dump you
24. Remember, there is more to life than marriage, sex and having children. You are a blessing with so much to accomplish and pursue as an individual
25. Don’t be hard on yourself. Pat yourself on the back for how far you have come.